According to Hofmann: Save time, be politically incorrect | According to Hofmann
There is a lot to be said about political correctness and the euphemisms it engenders, but some cases of political correctness have become a waste of time … literally.
For a perfect example, let’s look at the jockstrap – no, not the real thing; I’m talking about the word. Jockstrap – two syllables, no confusion, fine.
Somewhere, someone decided they didn’t like the word ‘jock’ because maybe it was a derogatory term used to describe an athlete or by the French name of Jake (or is- that Joe or Jimbo?). They were offended just enough to completely change their name and call the craft a “sports supporter”.
Athletic supporter – six syllables, which is three times more than jockstrap; I know this because I once learned how some math works.
But think about the time that was wasted by saying and writing “athletic supporter” instead of “jockstrap” – even typing it in earlier, I feel like I’m missing out on something else.
If you want scientific proof from someone who doesn’t know anything about science, I went to a search engine where it lists how fast to get results on a topic. I did two separate searches: one for “jockstrap” and one for “athletic supporter”.
The jockstrap search took 0.43 seconds to find results and the sports fan search took 0.55 seconds.
That’s 0.12 seconds lost in political correctness.
Imagine what you could have done during that period of time. You could have spent it blinking, starting an incomplete thought, or your brain could have signaled your body to flinch at a basketball soaring towards you.
When you really think about it, on a technical level, ask yourself what a sports fan is? He is passionate about sports, the one who supports athletes.
If you don’t think we need to go back to calling jockstraps “jockstraps” to save time, at least consider the confusion in some situations.
Imagine, if you will, the conversation in a locker room between the coach and his player before a match, but then imagine that the player does not know that a sports fan is a jockstrap:
COACH: Timmy, I hope you remembered to bring your sports fan today.
TIMMY: Yeah, coach, I bought four.
COACH: Four sports fans? It’s just a touch football game!
TIMMY: It’s cool. They are my parents and my grandparents on my mother’s side.
COACH: Do your kids give names to your jockstraps these days? Better to go out and wear a helmet this time.
To be fair, back then people started to call the jockstrap a cup.
While I’m glad they reduced it to one syllable, it still brings the confounding factor to another level. I won’t go into the gory details, but I’m sure there is a football team with parents angry with broken ceramic cups and players who can only pass on their love of their sport to their loved ones. if they adopt.
Or to put it mildly: they would have been better if they were accompanied by their sports fan.
According to Hofmann is written by journalist Mark Hofmann from Canton Rostraver. His books, “Bon deuil! A Guide to Biting the Big One … and Dying, Too” and “Stupid Brain” are available on Amazon.com